Day #28

Look at me...Maeve look...eye contact has always been fleeting with Maeve and Jo. I do not take the lack of eye contact personally at all due to the fact that they are both so loving and attentive, honestly I don't even realize they don't look at me unless it is brought up somehow. What I used to think was great eye contact during play or snuggle sessions upon further notice I realized was great focus on any portion of my face except the eyes. I have often wondered why insist on eye contact when I can tell they are focused on the task at hand or listening to what is being said, why insist on eye contact which is just more sensory input they have to contend with. This is an interesting quote from an article I was reading called "Should We Insist on Eye Contact with People who have Autism Spectrum Disorder", it will give you something to think about: (spoken by a person on the spectrum) "Eye contact is something that I have always had trouble with. It does not come naturally to me and I do not appreciate having to give it all of the time, especially to people that I do not know. All of the stress that is put on doing it makes me more nervous, tense, and scared. Doing it also assumes that I can read the message in another person's eyes. Don't count on it! I can look at a person's eyes and not be able to tell what they are saying to me... ...as a child, my eye contact was much worse than it is right now. People without autism could not understand why I would not look them in the eye... just because I am not making eye contact with you does not mean that I am not listening to you or paying attention to you. I can concentrate better not having to keep eye contact at the same time. I tell people, 'You have a choice. Do you want a conversation or do you want eye contact? You will not get both unless I am comfortable with you and do not have to concentrate so much on the eye contact'."